One of our sisters reflects on her long journey as an Helper. She uses a quote of Father Arrupe, a former Superior General of the Jesuits, as she shares her experience as a professional therapist. Here is an extract from her reflection.
“Nothing is more practical than finding God, than, falling in love in a quite absolute, final way. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you do with your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, whom you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything. “(Pedro Arrupe, S.J).
My years in religious life have given me the opportunity to see this quote lived in concrete ways. I have witnessed the motivated generosity of the sisters in my local community, my province, Helpers around the world. I have seen my sisters move toward people who were rejected by others, spend time with the homeless and destitute, welcome those who were different from themselves. I have seen them courageously move toward those whom others would avoid out of fear and disgust. I have seen them protest, speak out and I have been inspired by what I have seen.
Living with women like this broadened my vision. I saw things with new eyes in numerous conversations over the dinner table, in weekend meetings. I listened and I learned that we were not alone in the movement toward compassion and helping as a way of being in this world. I came to understand more deeply that religious did not have the corner on the market to generosity, service, spirit of prayer, spirituality, or desire for union with God. I was often amazed with joy and gratitude with the heroic lives of very ordinary companions.
And, yes, I also learned that we could hurt one another, sometimes quite deeply. And it can take us a very long time to heal. I have come to know my sisters as women who know they need to be forgiven and also as women who need to freely offer forgiveness to others. I have known both sides of that experience. And, I came to understand that our loving God has a way o finding us when we hide , when we loose ourself and when we are trying to avoid our own pain.
Fortunately, I was given tremendous companions on my journey- other helpers but also friends in other religious Congregations, priests, lay women, families, understanding mentors, great spiritual directors, skilled therapists and a few good friends at each stage. In looking back, I know God’s love accompanied me. I like to hope that I am continuing to be molded into a more loving person. I remember hearing one Jesuit say- we do not just easily fall into being compassionate persons. It is hammered into us by the bruises and blows that are levelled at us as we grow and mature. Yes F. Arrupe, “falling in love” is easy, “staying in love” is incredibly hard.